Welcome!

My name is Raffaela Milner. I’m a purple belt in BJJ, and I am determined to creating a state of mind and body that leads to an optimal life, a life of good health, thriving and authenticity.

My life journey has traversed studying physics and mathematics, working as a programmer, pursuing a career in Mixed Martial Arts, years of studying Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, and eventually teaching martial arts. Along the way, I started finding my mind and body showing symptoms of exhaustion—my complex PTSI* symptoms, resulting from childhood abuse, also started coming back in a much more extreme way, in spite of having gone through four years of therapy.

I decided to focus on healing myself, to give the world the best me that I can. To do that, I’m traveling the world, living as a minimalist, studying and teaching martial arts, and digging deeper into the psychology and biology of trauma.

Looking at trauma as a biological rather than a psychological condition has helped me resolve my symptoms which is the reason I think the key to a healthy life and optimal experience or flow is a balanced nervous system.

It’s clear to me that most of the problems we are facing—as individuals and as a collective—are consequences of our fixed state of mind, of our lost connection with nature, and of the unresolved and non-integrated trauma we’ve experienced. As a consequence of that most of us have a very unbalanced nervous system which results in a disability to regulate oneself. Because of this lack of self-regulation we then act out on our loved ones, ourselves, our children, society, and on the planet. By healing ourselves we lead by example, and arrive at a state where we can make a greater impact on the world.

This website is a place where I share my experiences, insights and thoughts on these topics through videos, podcasts, interviews, and writings. My hope is that this content will help others heal from their trauma, enabling a more enjoyable and fulfilled state of being and experiencing the world—or inspire ideas and methods to start their own journey of overcoming their negative patterns and transitioning into their own and optimal life, full of flow.

I hope you find something that connects with you here—enjoy the journey!

*(I do not really accept the labels of the modern clinical paradigm, but that would be the label that would best describe my symptoms.)

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